


Sherlock and Harry do Sass

by OctarineSparks



Category: Sherlock - Fandom
Genre: Humour, M/M, Omegle RP
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-16
Updated: 2014-04-16
Packaged: 2018-01-19 16:03:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 786
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1475758
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OctarineSparks/pseuds/OctarineSparks
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A short but sweet Omegle RP that I wanted to share because it cracked me up. All in Omegle form.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sherlock and Harry do Sass

**Author's Note:**

> If this was you, please let me know so I can credit you properly!

**Stranger:** [to Harry] Are you in possession of a contact number for either of your parents? -SH

**Stranger:** I would like to ask a question about John. -SH

**Stranger:** A personal one which has nothing to do with you so don't bother asking. -SH

**You:** Lovely to hear from you as always Sherlock. Perhaps you should start by asking him if either of them are still alive. I'll wait. HW

**Stranger:** Ah. -SH

**Stranger:** That makes this more awkward... -SH

**Stranger:** Bugger. -SH

**You:** You might as well ask me then, mightn't you? HW

**Stranger:** But I don't like you. -SH

**You:** I'm not exactly your biggest fan either Sherlock, and I doubt Mum and Dad would have warmed up to you much either. But we both like John, so let's start there, shall we? HW

**Stranger:** I suppose that would be logical, as my liking of John is what's causing this problem. -SH

**You:** Then hurry up and ask already, and then we can go back to hating each other. HW

**Stranger:** I... Want to ask John to marry me. -SH

**You:** Bloody hell. HW

**You:** Well, I'm hardly the keeper of his honour, and I don't expect a dowry from you. Go ahead. Good luck. HW

**Stranger:** Good. -SH

**Stranger:** Thank you... I suppose. -SH

**You:** You're welcome. And I know that John and I don't exactly see eye to eye, and there are a million people out there I would prefer as a brother in law, but he loves you, so know this. If you hurt him, I will hunt you down and trap important parts of you in a vice. Have a lovely day. HW

**Stranger:** Understood. -SH

**Stranger:** [one hour later] What if he says no? -SH

**You:** You're going to drag this out, aren't you? He won't say no. HW

**Stranger:** I don't want to drag anything out. -SH

**You:** Sherlock, in all the years my little brother has been alive, I have seen him broken. I have seen him torn apart by war, destroyed by broken hearts and yes, alright, I've seen him go through hell because of you. That is actually the main reason why I dislike you so. But I have NEVER seen my brother as happy as he has been since you two finally pulled your heads out of your arses and got together. So will you please go and ask him right now? He deserves to be happy, and the privilege of making him so is yours. HW

**Stranger:** Right. -SH

**Stranger:** Thank you. Again. Ugh. -SH

**Stranger:** Shall we agree to never speak again? -SH

**You:** I'll see you at the wedding. HW

**Stranger:** Unlikely. -SH

**You:** Live in hope Sherlock. HW

**Stranger:** Go away now. I have an attractive relative of yours to propose to and possibly have sex with. -SH

**You:** Jesus, that I did not need to hear. HW

**You:** You haven't got a sister, have you? HW

**Stranger:** Afraid not. -SH

**You:** Pity. Go on then. Go and make an honest man of my brother. HW

**Stranger:** If this goes well, I may put in a few good words for you to my cousin. -SH

**Stranger:** She's some kind of Russian ballet champion. -SH

**You:** Oh, be still my heart. And some other areas. HW

**Stranger:** Ugh. Go away now. -SH

**You:** Don't screw it up. HW

**Stranger:** I'll try. -SH

**You:** [an hour later] Did you do it yet? HW

**Stranger:** Busy. -SH

**You:** Sorry. HW

**Stranger:** [two hours later] Yes, I did it. -SH

**You:** And? HW

**Stranger:** He said yes, he cried a bit, we hugged, we got naked. -SH

**Stranger:** Predictable. -SH

**You:** You should have ended that sentence one bullet point sooner. But hey, congrats I guess. HW

**Stranger:** [contact details attached] I suppose I owe you this. -SH

**You:** Oh and a photo too. They do make you Holmes' well, don't they? HW

**Stranger:** Be gentle with her. She's very petite. -SH

**You:** You'd be surprised. It's always the quiet ones. HW

**Stranger:** Stop that. -SH

**You:** Absolutely not. HW

**You:** In fact, I would go as far to say that it was bath time for poor, neglected, /single/ Harry. At least I have your cousin's photo to amuse me, if you catch my drift. HW

**Stranger:** Every word you say is a constant reminder of why I hate you. -SH

**You:** Heaven forfend you ever like me, Sherlock. HW

**You:** Anyway, time for this little matchmaking fairy to go and wash her wings, or some other fantastical crap that's a metaphor for a little me time. Have a wonderful night, take a few deep breaths before you stand up in the morning. HW


End file.
